No. That is the straight forward, simple answer. I am not ready to move. I don't want to. Maybe I
Should think about moving, leaving, packing up, and not seeing everyone Either A) as often or B) ever again. JUST thinking about leaving my SCHOOL makes me sad, so what happens when I leave my HOME and my FAMILY and EVERYTHING ELSE. I've been outside a lot lately, even with the cold and the warm, just walking around South Weber listening to my Ipod. I have grown up on this street, running on it, learning to ride a bike, learning to ride a rip-stick, a scooter, most all of my birthday parties were here. I have grown up walking around this house. Sure, it's different.....Actually, it's really different, but it's still the house I came to after leaving the hospital, and the one I have come home to almost every day after school, the one where I sleep Sunday through Friday and Most weekends to, the one where I do homework, the one where I LIVE. Easter, Christmas, Halloween, Even SAINT PATRICK'S day have all been here, every year for the last 13 almost 14 years. I can't imagine them anyplace else, any other way. And the worst part is, I don't want to imagine them that way. I want to keep them this way. I don't want to leave Sheree, and Kam, and My friends, and move far away from my family, and From Ashley, from the park I have had millions of Saturday picnics in, away from the place that I have always been. The places that are important to me. Heck, even my first KISS was in South Weber!!!! My First CRUSH lives a block away! My first best friend still goes to church with me. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE i love is here, or close enough that I consider them here. I'm not ready to leave all that behind. I'm not ready to find a new best friend, and relearn my Address and my Phone number and I'm not ready to start a new school without these people that I know and I'm especially not ready to LEAVE. It's just so final. To Leave. To be gone. To move on. It's like leaving everything I have to start a new life, one that could go any which way. I could be popular, I could be the loser no one talks to, I could be the Class NERD for Pete's sake. And I like my little niche Here. The one that I have carved Here. At sunset, in South Weber, with my family nearby, my friends, my LIFE. Walking through the same malls, seeing movies at the same places, eating at all the same restaurants. It's not just something I WANT to let go of, something I WANT to leave. It's a fact, were moving, were leaving, and I HATE that fact. I can't stand it. I don't want to leave.
Well I hope it works out to be a great move for you, that you make lots of new friends and have some great new experiences. I always thought you were one of the pretties babies I had ever seen, and I see your pictures now and you have grown into a very lovely young lady, I am sure you will be very popular.
ReplyDeleteWhat can I say.. We hope it will happen. I truly think it will be good for you. But of course you already know that, and you also know wether it succeeds or not is up to you as well. But for now - don't worry, the house hasn't sold yet.
ReplyDeleteyou are absolutely right, moving is hard and it is sad to leave all those things and people behind, but there are also blessings too. There's a chance to start fresh, to be a better person, people won't judge you based on the past- there are new adventures and challenges. I have moved lots, and even when you're older it's hard- you still have to make new friends and find new things to do and make new memories- even your mom will have to do that- (kinda crazy huh). no matter what happens you're a trooper and you'll make it through- promise
ReplyDeleteMakae, I moved to Layton at the beginning of the 8th grade. I lived in SLC my whole life up until that point. I felt like you do. I was angry. Mad that I had to make new friends, mad that I had to be the new girl in school.
ReplyDeleteI thought it wasnt fair that my mom and dad got to go to work with their friends, and I didnt get to keep mine.
I think I understand how you could feel. But let me tell you... moving was the best thing ever. And I often thank my Heavenly Father for that blessing.
Layton is where i met my husband, its where I truely gained a testimony. Layton is the place that I call home now. (South Weber is close, right).
I know that Heavenly Father knows you. He knows what is in store for you. There are blessings just waiting for you. And you might have to move to get them.
Love You- Sister Peterson
Well, it's a good thing Kristanne said your house hasn't sold yet, because your post made me think you were leaving next week!
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to pull up roots. I lived in one place from kindergarten until I left for college. I left the house I grew up in on my own terms, although it was still hard when the folks and younger siblings moved to Indiana when I was two years into college. It was an adjustment to have "home" leave me, but ultimately worked out for the best. Wherever you end up, Makae, you'll do well.