- Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment
- A pattern of unstable relationships
- unstable self-image or sense of self
- Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior
- instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)
- Chronic feelings of emptiness
- Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)
- Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms
- Easily set off or triggered
This would explain a ton of problems I have. The bipolar-ness, the sad-ness, the angry-ness, the incapability to make and keep friends for a long time, the impulsivity (such as sneaking out late at night for no reason), and just about everything else. It would also explain why I seem to have ruined alot of friendships, why I get extremely angry and say horrible things and then calm down and am terribly sorry. The best part of discovering this, besides putting a name on it, is that I can finally get treatment for it!
That probably sounds like, ahem, she's crazy, she wants treatment, but as hard as it is to stop, I don't want to have these issues. I want to be a happy person. Finally
Borderline Personality Disorder, Or BPD. There is the name. Let's hope it's the right one.